Written By: Jessica Loughlin, LCSW
"How can my child be so smart and still struggle so much with reading?" Parents of twice-exceptional children ask some version of this question frequently, and it captures a real puzzle. A child may hold sophisticated conversations, solve complex problems, and recall every detail of a favorite subject, yet labor over a page of text that classmates move through with ease. When those two realities sit side by side, reading can become a steady source of frustration for the child and confusion for the adults around them.
Dyslexia is one of the most common learning differences and one of the most misunderstood. In intellectually gifted children, it is especially easy to overlook. This post outlines what dyslexia is, how its signs shift across development, why giftedness and dyslexia can obscure one another, and what support typically involves for children and their families.
What Dyslexia Is, and What It Is Not
Dyslexia is a language-based learning difference with a neurobiological origin. Research shows that the brain processes written language differently in people with dyslexia, particularly when linking letters to the sounds they represent. The Yale Center for Dyslexia & Creativity describes dyslexia as an unexpected difficulty in learning to read. That framing is particularly relevant for bright children, whose reading skills may lag well behind their reasoning and verbal abilities.
Although reading is the most visible area of difficulty, dyslexia reaches further. It can also shape spelling, written expression, and speech, including how quickly a person retrieves the word they want. It is also lifelong. Effective instruction helps children learn to read, but many people continue to read more slowly or find spelling challenging into adulthood, alongside significant strengths.
Several persistent misconceptions make dyslexia harder to recognize. According to Understood, a nonprofit resource for families of children with learning and thinking differences, dyslexia is not:
Defined by reversing letters. Many young children write letters backward as a normal part of development, and some children with dyslexia never reverse letters at all.
A vision problem. Children with dyslexia are no more likely than their peers to have eye or vision problems.
A question of effort. Reading difficulty in dyslexia reflects how the brain processes language, not motivation. The type of instruction a child receives matters far more than how hard they try.
Caused by too little reading at home. Shared reading benefits every child, but limited exposure to books does not cause dyslexia.
Limited to English. Dyslexia occurs across languages. In multilingual children it is sometimes identified later, because reading struggles are attributed to learning a new language.
Absent until elementary school. Early signs can emerge in the preschool years.
How the Signs Shift Across Development
Because dyslexia affects the language skills that reading depends on, its signs look different at different ages. Recognizing that progression helps parents and educators distinguish typical variation from a pattern worth evaluating.
Preschool and Kindergarten
In young children, early indicators tend to involve spoken language rather than print. A child may be a late talker, have difficulty recognizing or producing rhymes, or find it hard to learn letter names and the sounds that go with them.
Early Elementary School
Once formal reading instruction begins, difficulty connecting letters and sounds becomes more apparent. Children may guess at words based on the first letter or the pictures, read slowly and with considerable effort, and find spelling especially demanding. Letter reversals that persist past the end of first grade can also be a reason to look more closely.
Older Children, Teens, and Adults
By the upper grades, many students with dyslexia can decode words but continue to read slowly. Reading may be accurate yet laborious, which affects comprehension and stamina as assignments grow longer. Spelling and written expression can remain hard, and some teens and adults notice trouble finding the right word in conversation.
When Giftedness and Dyslexia Coexist
Twice-exceptional, or 2e, describes children who are intellectually gifted and also have a learning or developmental difference, such as dyslexia, ADHD, or autism. These children are frequently among the last to be identified, because their strengths and challenges interact in ways that can conceal both. Masking tends to take one of three forms:
Strengths conceal the difficulty. A gifted child may draw on a strong vocabulary, reasoning, and context clues to compensate for weak decoding. Their reading may land near grade level, which is well below their potential but not low enough to raise concern. The gap may surface only when reading demands increase in upper elementary or middle school.
The difficulty conceals the strengths. When reading and writing are the primary ways a child is asked to show what they know, a child with dyslexia may appear average or below average in class, and their reasoning, curiosity, and verbal ability may go unrecognized in academic settings.
Each offsets the other. In some children, giftedness and dyslexia balance out so completely that the child presents as a typical student, and neither exceptionality is identified.
Delayed identification carries real costs. A bright child who works twice as hard to read may be described as unmotivated or careless, and may come to the same conclusion about themselves. Some 2e children develop perfectionism, avoid reading-heavy tasks, or feel anxious about school, particularly when they are acutely aware of the distance between what they understand and what they can produce on the page. Because anxiety and attention difficulties can also overlap and mask one another, a full picture of the child matters.
The Emotional Weight of Reading Struggles
For many families, the hardest part of dyslexia is the strain it places on relationships. Homework can become a nightly point of conflict, parents may feel caught between pushing too hard and not pushing enough, and children may begin to dread anything that involves print.
Jessica Loughlin, LCSW, a clinician at Everyday Parenting Psychology who works with parents of twice-exceptional children, hears this tension regularly. In her experience, understanding why reading is so difficult for a child who is gifted in other areas tends to change the dynamic. When parents see the difficulty as a reflection of how their child's brain processes language, rather than a lack of effort or care, there is more room for empathy, and some of the pressure surrounding reading begins to ease.
The shift matters for the child as well. Children take cues from adults about what their struggles mean, and a shared, accurate understanding of dyslexia helps a child separate reading challenges from their sense of their own intelligence.
What Support Typically Involves
Support for dyslexia usually spans several areas, and the right combination depends on the child's age, learning profile, and setting. For twice-exceptional children, effective support addresses the area of need while leaving room for advanced abilities to keep developing.
Comprehensive Evaluation
A thorough psychoeducational or neuropsychological evaluation clarifies a child's profile of strengths and weaknesses and can identify dyslexia alongside giftedness or co-occurring conditions such as ADHD or anxiety. For 2e children, examining the full cognitive profile rather than reading scores alone is essential, since grade-level performance can conceal a significant discrepancy.
Structured Literacy Instruction
Research supports explicit, systematic instruction in the sound structure of language and how it maps onto print, an approach often called structured literacy. Many programs use multisensory methods that engage sight, sound, and touch. The quality and type of instruction, more than effort alone, is what drives lasting progress.
Accommodations and Access
Accommodations such as audiobooks, text-to-speech tools, extended time, and alternatives to handwritten work let children engage with content at the level of their thinking, so a reading challenge does not set the ceiling on what a gifted child can learn.
Partnership With School
Schools are central partners in supporting children with dyslexia. Evaluation results and documentation inform eligibility for an IEP or 504 plan, and because services are allocated according to demonstrated need, that documentation typically centers on areas of difficulty. Understanding how the process works helps families approach school planning and advocacy as a collaborative effort with educators.
Support for Parents
Parent coaching can help families understand their child's profile, reduce conflict around reading, and identify resources at home and at school.
How Everyday Parenting Psychology Supports 2e Families
Jessica works with parents of twice-exceptional children, including children with dyslexia and other learning differences. She helps parents understand why reading is so hard for a child who excels elsewhere, connect with their child around reading rather than battle over it, and locate support at home and at school. This work is part of our broader neurodiversity-affirming therapy services for children, adolescents, and families in New York City and Westchester, grounded in the principles described in what neurodiversity-affirming care means.
For families who want to learn more, these organizations offer reliable, research-based information:
Understood (understood.org): parent-friendly guidance on learning and thinking differences
International Dyslexia Association (dyslexiaida.org): research, fact sheets, and professional standards for reading instruction
Yale Center for Dyslexia & Creativity (dyslexia.yale.edu): research on dyslexia and the strengths that often accompany it
The Windward School (thewindwardschool.org): an independent school in Westchester and New York City dedicated to students with language-based learning disabilities
Conclusion
A child can be highly capable and still find reading difficult. Holding both truths at once is at the heart of supporting a twice-exceptional child with dyslexia, and accurate understanding, appropriate instruction, and a steady relationship around reading give these children room to grow in every area of their ability.
If your family is navigating dyslexia, giftedness, or the space between them, our clinicians can help you make sense of your child's profile and identify next steps. Contact our team to learn more about working with Jessica.
At Everyday Parenting, we believe in empowering families to create meaningful connections and navigate challenges with compassion and confidence. Whether you're seeking strategies to address specific behaviors or simply want to strengthen your family bond, we’re here to support you every step of the way. Contact us today to learn how our evidence-based approaches can help your family thrive.
